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One thing was obvious. Austin and I were never going to have any kindof relationship not even as friends. It was stupid for us to keeptrying. Some of the problem was me but part of it was the over the topway he handled things like today. Having faced up to the truth I feltbetter.I was happy to see Shelly waiting for me at the lunchroom doors. Weslipped in line, me and my sister. The aroma of tomato and meat saucemixed with grease was heavy in the air.The din of a hundredconversations all going at once filled my ears. I opened myself to thefamiliar sounds and smells. There was something comforting about itall. This was a part of my world and I was fine with it.I remembered Mrs. Gartman's kitchen, warm and cozy, filled with its ownsounds and smells. That was where we had the conversation onserendipity. She believed Shelly and I were destined to become friends.But if I followed that logic to its conclusion, then there were noaccidents or coincidences. Things would have to be predestined,. I just emptied the contents of the bag into the drawer that once held my old lingerie without paying much attention since we'd been told we wouldn't be wearing underwear except on special occasions.It took me a minute to find the bikini. It was nothing more than a tangle of pale blue string. I didn't know what it was when I first spotted it in among the bras and panties. I certainly didn't recognize it as a swimming suit! When I couldn't find a bikini I went back through the contents of the drawer. This time when I came to the little tangle of blue string I held it up and straightened it out.I stared at it in disbelief for a very long time. I might just as well go outside naked! I couldn't imagine stepping outside in broad daylight wearing that little ball of string and the three sheer patches of cloth that would be my only covering.I was still holding it up, staring at it in shock when Kenzie came in wearing hers. She was already blushing just thinking about spending the day outside.
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